Take Me Out
Dating shows, oh how many of us love sitting down to observe how some people go about finding that 'special person'. Tons have passed before our eyes over the years. The legendary bastion of dating show supremacy in the UK was Blind Date. For years it was unrivalled, it had no equal.
Over the last few years a new one has emerged as a popular mainstay for British audiences. Prime time viewing was not quite the same without a dating show. Now, we have one that stands alone in its own right as an extremely popular and funny programme, and it goes by the name of - Take Me Out.
This show, for me, a self confessed avid viewer of it, cannot deny how it entertains my silly receptive mind and reduces me to often bouts of laughter and dismay.
Let me break it down...
The Host: Paddy McGuinness, is a fine host of a man. A talented comedian, his quick wit and snappy/cheesy lines add charm to the programme. He is the perfect person to host and carry a show like this along.
The premise of the Take Me Out is: 30 desperate 'women' all seeking to find 'Mr Right'. They are placed behind stands like hungry she wolves waiting for a man to come down the 'love lift' all wanting the chance of winning a date and going on a cheap holiday to to the 'Isle of Fernando's' (a mythical island, that is basically a Spanish resort) but don't tell some of these hapless females. Some actually believe it to be a real place.
So, the man, (brave piece of meat) comes down the love lift to his choice of music. The women get excited with the utmost anticipation. As his shoes are first revealed, then his legs, middle, torso and face. They often squeal with unreserved delight and clap like demented seals - as the chap emerges from the lift to a chorus of noise and sometimes lip licking salivating hungriness.
Note, this is not always the case; the show is extremely superficial. If you ain't got it got it 'going on' ie - You look A) Creepy, B) Old, C) Odd, D) Not the best looking dude in the world... well, my brother, there is a strong possibility that vultures will buzz you once you have settled to announce your name and where you have come from. (A mental asylum perhaps).
The buzzing etiquette is to demonstrate if you 'dig' the man or not. If you like what he looks like and later displays, (the cut of his jib) then generally, a light will be left on. But trust me, these 'women' and I have to use the word women in the loosest of terms - because some of them can not be called that. Many display the features of canine animals, farm yard dwelling livestock and zoo like creatures. (The harsh reality is that some of these cup cakes really have no hope in hell of winning a date). Yes, the show affords a more than generous proportion of ropey looking females the chance to meet a man. You could say Take Me Out has an animal loving/humanitarian core to it. I must add, that not all of the women are dodgy looking. However, the attractive ones are strictly at a premium.
A lot of the men arrive on the show bristling with confidence and bravado as they enter the lions den. Many supremely preened and buffed like shiny new shoes. They believe this is enough to satisfy the insatiable pedantic appetites of the mob. It is never enough. A short VT (video tape) showcasing themselves to the women is shown, if your appearance was not enough for gross assumptions to be made - then this could be the beginning of your demise.
Buzzer happy fingers begin to buzz as the often foolish man blabs on about how he loves money and his car and hopes to meet a woman that can keep, his, say; engine running for example. Or, he will show off his body and say he is a sensitive soul who needs Miss right to come along and tuck him into bed, blurgh! Now, my friend, this kind of rubbish does not wash with highly strung 'women'.
I understand what the word fussy means. But, I am regularly astounded by how super fussy the wolves are. They are likely to buzz their lights if you happen to say - you love your family or that you like to read books and study. No, no, no! In the minds of irrational goats that means that you will have less time for them or that you are far too intelligent.
If the slab of meat happens to survive that round in reasonable tact - then he will often have to perform a 'talent' (cringe). You hope he can impress the farm/zoo - as many creatures on the show do not possess the patience to watch a bloke - sing/dance/rap/strip/make a fool of himself. Some men manage to get through this round. Lights can often be left untouched.
The man can feel confidence flowing through his body as he surveys the females who still like him. But it is not a wise thing to become too complacent. Another VT is thrown into the arena for the hyenas to digest. And as regular viewers will be aware of - they more than chew on the fat provided. A family member or 'friends' will often twist the knife and shame the poor sod. Embarrassing stories are relayed with what seems like cruel pleasure as they smile their way through a segment that usually kills the male off. Many of the 'women' by this point have heard enough and go buzzer bezerk.
If the piece of meat has survived these treacherous ordeals and has lights left on then he has the power to choose who he wants to date. The dynamics change instantly - and the 'women' become oh so vulnerable and desperate as they dearly want a date and a holiday. The male ego returns as he can switch off the lights of whoever he doesn't fancy. The gutted looks on some of the gargoyles is priceless as another week passes and a date has not materialised.
If he has a few to ditch (throw in the bin), he has to whittle it down to the last two - subsequently, Mr Man has to then decide who he likes the most. Once chosen, they leave the set in not so much jubilation, but happy to have escaped the lair that is Take Me Out.
Saturday night viewing is that much better for this programme.
Demola, TCC
This show, for me, a self confessed avid viewer of it, cannot deny how it entertains my silly receptive mind and reduces me to often bouts of laughter and dismay.
Let me break it down...
The Host: Paddy McGuinness, is a fine host of a man. A talented comedian, his quick wit and snappy/cheesy lines add charm to the programme. He is the perfect person to host and carry a show like this along.
The premise of the Take Me Out is: 30 desperate 'women' all seeking to find 'Mr Right'. They are placed behind stands like hungry she wolves waiting for a man to come down the 'love lift' all wanting the chance of winning a date and going on a cheap holiday to to the 'Isle of Fernando's' (a mythical island, that is basically a Spanish resort) but don't tell some of these hapless females. Some actually believe it to be a real place.
So, the man, (brave piece of meat) comes down the love lift to his choice of music. The women get excited with the utmost anticipation. As his shoes are first revealed, then his legs, middle, torso and face. They often squeal with unreserved delight and clap like demented seals - as the chap emerges from the lift to a chorus of noise and sometimes lip licking salivating hungriness.
Note, this is not always the case; the show is extremely superficial. If you ain't got it got it 'going on' ie - You look A) Creepy, B) Old, C) Odd, D) Not the best looking dude in the world... well, my brother, there is a strong possibility that vultures will buzz you once you have settled to announce your name and where you have come from. (A mental asylum perhaps).The buzzing etiquette is to demonstrate if you 'dig' the man or not. If you like what he looks like and later displays, (the cut of his jib) then generally, a light will be left on. But trust me, these 'women' and I have to use the word women in the loosest of terms - because some of them can not be called that. Many display the features of canine animals, farm yard dwelling livestock and zoo like creatures. (The harsh reality is that some of these cup cakes really have no hope in hell of winning a date). Yes, the show affords a more than generous proportion of ropey looking females the chance to meet a man. You could say Take Me Out has an animal loving/humanitarian core to it. I must add, that not all of the women are dodgy looking. However, the attractive ones are strictly at a premium.
A lot of the men arrive on the show bristling with confidence and bravado as they enter the lions den. Many supremely preened and buffed like shiny new shoes. They believe this is enough to satisfy the insatiable pedantic appetites of the mob. It is never enough. A short VT (video tape) showcasing themselves to the women is shown, if your appearance was not enough for gross assumptions to be made - then this could be the beginning of your demise.
Buzzer happy fingers begin to buzz as the often foolish man blabs on about how he loves money and his car and hopes to meet a woman that can keep, his, say; engine running for example. Or, he will show off his body and say he is a sensitive soul who needs Miss right to come along and tuck him into bed, blurgh! Now, my friend, this kind of rubbish does not wash with highly strung 'women'.I understand what the word fussy means. But, I am regularly astounded by how super fussy the wolves are. They are likely to buzz their lights if you happen to say - you love your family or that you like to read books and study. No, no, no! In the minds of irrational goats that means that you will have less time for them or that you are far too intelligent.
If the piece of meat has survived these treacherous ordeals and has lights left on then he has the power to choose who he wants to date. The dynamics change instantly - and the 'women' become oh so vulnerable and desperate as they dearly want a date and a holiday. The male ego returns as he can switch off the lights of whoever he doesn't fancy. The gutted looks on some of the gargoyles is priceless as another week passes and a date has not materialised.
If he has a few to ditch (throw in the bin), he has to whittle it down to the last two - subsequently, Mr Man has to then decide who he likes the most. Once chosen, they leave the set in not so much jubilation, but happy to have escaped the lair that is Take Me Out.
Saturday night viewing is that much better for this programme.
Demola, TCC
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