The little word 'no'

I've been thinking. About the little word 'no'. Probably one of the smallest yet most powerful words in the universe. Everybody has used it, perhaps millions of times and continue to use it. However, I have come to the stark realisation that in the age of cautious people, a lot of individuals are not comfortable with being blunt and straight forward in certain aspects of their lives. Basically, my friends, the vast population will try and sugar coat this word. Not my parents as I was growing up. If I asked for something and they didn't want to give it to me they had no such qualms with saying NO. Strict parents aside, let me continue with my thoughts on this pertinent matter.

 

I shall explain...

 

Have you ever been asked to lend somebody money? I am sure the answer is yes. Have you ever felt like just saying 'no'. Again, the answer is probably yes. But, why do we find it hard to use this little word in that straight forward context? If we don't want to lend the money or don't actually have it - we will say something like: Oh sorry, I don't have it etc, etc... when we in reasonable theory could have just said a simple curt no. It's our money after all. We aren't obliged to giving it way to certain people that ask.

 

Ever been asked to go somewhere that you don't fancy going to? Of course you have. Have you replied an instant 'no', Perhaps not. Again, the little word will be sweetened up with: Oh I am busy, or I already have plans - just can't make it. People, what is wrong with saying NO!

 

So, I was speaking with my sister about this and how folk find it hard to say no to various people who ask and request all sorts. I was being brash, saying: "If somebody asks  me something that I don't want to do or anything like that - I am just going to start saying no! I don't care - I'm going to just say it. Big Issue sellers, beggars, canvasser's - straight up NO in ya faces."

 

She said to me that it's not easy you know, people can't help being polite when using the word no.

 

I wasn't having it. I'm saying no and that's that.

 

That same evening after our conversation I found myself in a local shop a familiar bum who believes he is my friend was mooching about in there. He saw me and asked how I was. I replied: "OK," and wanted to be away from him as quickly as possible. He paused for a moment and then asked me if I could lend him 20pence. Instantly I replied: "Sorry, I don't have it." He said OK and then trudged out of the door.

 

Then it hit me, why didn't I just say NO! Why did I ladden it with sugar?! Why did I even lie? I had the 20pence, I had several 20 pence pieces in my pocket. Although he wasn't to know. Plus, I was in no mood to contribute towards his next can of lager.

 

Look's like saying a simple a 'no' is harder than I thought.

 

 

Demola, TCC